After we discovered Beckett’s elephant statues, the plot bunnies just wouldn’t leave me alone with this silly little one shot. Sure, it’s a bit ridiculous but I’m just a ridiculous type of person. That’s how I roll. I’m not sure exactly how many elephant statues Beckett has but the most I’ve ever seen in the show is four, so that’s what I went with. And this is the first fanfic I’ve ever actually posted anywhere btw so…yeah…I couldn’t resist this one.

Det. Beckett walked into the precinct and headed for her desk. As she got closer she noticed that Castle, who was sitting in his usual chair, with his back to her, seemed to be talking to someone. The only problem was that there was nobody else there. Tilting her head questioningly as she drew nearer, she noted that he wasn’t on the phone either.  She pulled up behind him and looked over his shoulder to discover that he was holding two of her porcelain elephant statues and facing them towards each other in order to narrate their “conversation.”

“But Mom! I don’t want to take a bath!” Castle said, bouncing the smaller elephant on the desk.

High pitched, with a motherly tone, he turned and spoke for the larger elephant, throwing in his best Georgia accent, “Now son! We have been ova this many a time…”

“Castle! What are you doin’?” Kate interrupted him, horror written all over her face.

Startled, he jumped slightly in his chair then quickly said, “Just waiting for you Detective…and talking to my little friends,” he added with a nervous laugh and a sheepish grin.

“Wow, you are a child!” She said, tossing a folder onto her desk and walking around to sit down in her chair.

“Yeah…” He replied distractedly, smiling and looking off into the distance. “Hey, have you named these little guys yet because I was thinking, this one could be…”

She cut him off, roughly yanking the statues from his hands and saying, “Don’t touch my elephants!” Then she proceeded to set them all in a straight line on her desk.

He frowned a little but then reiterated determinedly, “Cause I was thinking!…In honor of that Donald Duck short, ‘Working for Peanuts,’ your big elephant could be Dolores and those two smaller ones could be Chipped and Dale, get it? Since that one is chipped right there, see?” He pointed to a small chip on one of their ears. “Then, in keeping with the Disney theme, the other little one could be Dumbo!” He smiled triumphantly and waited for her response.

She simply rolled her eyes, irritated, then said sternly, “I have work to do Castle. Why don’t you go make yourself useful and bring me some coffee or something.”

“Fine! You’re always so grumpy in the mornings.” He said with a scowl as he got up and began making his way to the break room.

“Maybe I wouldn’t be if I didn’t have to come to work and babysit a five year old.” She didn’t look up from the paper she was now apparently reading.

“Oh! Aheh heh heh,” he laughed mockingly at her and turned around to face her. “Just so virtuous aren’t we? ‘I’m Detective Beckett and I have the audacity to hold cute little elephants in captivity but refuse to even give them names!’” He made some overly feminine gestures to emphasize his imitation of her.

“Zip it Castle!”

He started to walk away again only to stop, snap his fingers, and turn around once more. “Oh I see!” He said, overdramatizing the look of revelation that crossed his face. “You just haven’t named them because you couldn’t come up with anything good. Now you’re jealous that I, and my immense wit, have foiled your attempts with our priceless names!”

She raised an eyebrow and gave him her trademark ‘you’re a lunatic’ expression and said, “In your dreams.”

With a cheeky grin he stated, “You know I’m right.” Then turned on his heel and made a beeline for the break room.

Watching him walk away, she rolled her eyes, let out an amused breath, and failed in her attempt to stifle a smile. Then, shaking her head and smiling to herself, she made one more small adjustment to her neat little row of elephant statues.

P.S. If you haven’t seen “Working for Peanuts” look it up on youtube. It makes me laugh every time I watch it.

Very cute! Love it!

Aww I love it I could totally see castle and Beckett doing that.

Loved it, good fun stuff

Wahahahha. This is hilarious, lols. I really love this.

Very funny and cute! You captured them perfectly. Thanks for sharing